Healthy Kids
THE PERMANENTE MEDICAL GROUP

Birthday wishes

Happy Birthday!

Birthdays are special and important times. They are important times to pause and remember the amazing moment your child was born and the first few days of his life. You will remember steps and stages in his life so far. Birthdays are also important times to enjoy who each child has become and dream together of who he will be. Of course, birthdays should be special days that celebrate the unique and wonderful person your child is. Have fun and enjoy sharing the memories, dreams, and celebrations.

We would also like to suggest that birthdays are times to think about protecting your child’s health by scheduling a well-check visit. Doing this allows you to and your child to maintain a close relationship with your pediatrician. At this visit we will check your child’s growth, development, and immunizations. Check the "My health manager" tab on kp.org for more detailed information about your child's health and medical care. To make the most of your well-check visit, please review this information and write down any questions you would like to discuss.

Kaiser Permanente has a range of services and online information to support you and your family. Check out your doctor's home page for healthy living resources and online programs to help you both thrive in the next year together. We hope that this newsletter continues to help you along the journey as your child gets older.

"Birthdays are occasions to find our meaning in life and to be thankful for our wonderful family. My brother and I were blessed with lots of cousins, which meant that there were lots of birthdays to celebrate! It seemed like my parents invited the whole community, as the house always teemed with people on birthdays. My mother did not bake much, but she took the time to make beautiful cakes for us. One special aspect of our birthdays was that we always ate our cake first! My father's philosophy was, 'Life is uncertain; eat dessert first.' Birthdays continue to be special now that I have two children of my own. These are wonderful times to talk to them about the value of their friends and family. I have tried to copy my mother's tradition of baking cakes on my children's birthdays at least every other year!”
Padmaja Padalkar, MD, Pediatrics, Kaiser Permanente San Jose

Mealtimes and activities

Get moving

  • Brainstorm with your child about what activities appeal to him. Most kids don’t mind being active, as long as it’s fun and engaging. Your 7-year-old will appreciate being asked for his opinion.
  • Encourage free play and keep a variety of sports equipment around the house: hula hoops, jump ropes, bikes, softballs, and soccer balls can keep your child busy and active.

Eat smart

  • Sit down for family meals whenever possible. Kids who regularly engage in family mealtime tend to eat more grains, fruits, and vegetables than those who do not. Eating dinner together gives you time to reconnect as a family after a full day.
  • Don’t force your child to eat. Many parents grew up being told to clean their plate, which does not encourage awareness of hunger signs and proper eating habits. If your child is not hungry he should still share family time at the table.
  • Avoid making alternate or later meals. Your child will not starve, and you are not a bad parent if he misses a meal.

Pull the plug

  • Eating in front of the TV is a bad habit; attention goes to the television and away from the experience of eating. This often leads to overeating.
  • Take control of the viewing habits in your household. Encourage your child to consider TV as an occasional entertainment source rather than an everyday habit. Make this the standard for everyone in your home.

Drink well

  • Be aware that many beverages contain caffeine, including tea, hot chocolate, chocolate milk, and caffeinated sodas. Caffeine and kids do not mix well, another reason to stick with water and 1 percent or nonfat milk.
  • Too much sugar and kids don’t mix either. If your child has flavored drinks, the label should show 5 or fewer calories per serving. It is best to avoid diet or artificially sweetened drinks too. They do not have calories, but nutritionists link sweet-tasting drinks to seeking sweetened foods and excess calorie intake.

Development milestones

Seven is heaven! Your child has passed through all of the challenges of the toddler years, is comfortable in school, and still loves to spend time with you. This should be a calm and fun period. Enjoy it by spending lots of time with your 7-year-old. She will be enthusiastic and curious. She will enjoy sharing the new skills she is mastering in school.

You can encourage her school success in several ways:

  • Help her unwind after school with a cuddle and a snack.
  • Set up firm routines for preparing for school in the morning and doing homework in the afternoon.
  • Choose a fixed time and place for homework. Be nearby to answer questions and share in her new knowledge.
  • Make learning important and fun by showing your interest, having lots of books and games at home, and letting her see you reading and learning.

Most children by age 7:

  • Grow about 2 1/2 inches and gain about 7 pounds in a year.
  • Lose about 4 baby teeth each year. These are replaced by permanent teeth.
  • Have a solid sense of time. They understand seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, seasons, and sometimes years. (But that doesn’t mean they are on time. It may still take them years to get ready for school in the morning.)
  • Can solve simple math problems using objects, such as counting beads.
  • Pronounce words correctly. (For example, most children do not substitute the sound "fr" for "thr" in words like "through.")
  • Use a pencil to write their name and use safety scissors easily.

Your child may:

  • Tend to talk a lot in situations where she is comfortable.
  • Play in larger groups occasionally, but also need time alone.
  • Be developing friendships, usually with other children of the same gender. She may even have a best friend, but it is normal for this friend to change from week to week. You can help your child understand that she can have many good friends at one time.
  • Be overcoming some fears she had when she was younger, but still can be terrified of the unknown. For example, going to a new school can be a tremendous stress for a 7-year-old. Many children also fear being in trouble with their parents or other adults. They are generally worried about the opinions of others.

Many children this age are becoming:

  • Better readers, but sounding out vowels can still be hard.
  • More coordinated in activities that use the large muscles, such as swimming and climbing.
  • More aware of and sensitive to the feelings of others. This trait is called empathy.

You can find more information about your child’s development on kp.org

Keep in mind that children develop at different rates. So, if your child isn't doing all of these things just yet, you'll likely see them soon. If you are concerned about your child's development, talk to your pediatrician at your next well-check, or send a secure message with your question.

Successful parenting

Much like homework, adding chores to a child’s life helps teach him how to balance play and work, while also promoting responsibility. Of course, most children prefer to play, and may not be exactly eager to empty the dishwasher or fold laundry. Getting kids to do chores may seem like more trouble than it is worth, but it pays off in the long run.

The chore advantage

Doing individual chores helps build confidence and independence. Chores done as a family promote both family bonding and the importance of contributing. According to sociologists, people who did chores as children are more likely to do community or volunteer work as adults, and they may be more successful partners in domestic relationships.

How to get started

Choose appropriate chores for your child for his maturity level, abilities, and character. Most parents have been in the habit of doing everything for their child for so long, that they underestimate how much he is capable of. Most 7–year-olds can set the table or fold the laundry. An active child who likes to be outdoors may do better raking leaves or washing the car.

Allow for imperfection. Try to ignore your desire to have things done as you would do them. At least in the beginning, accept that getting the work done is for the benefit of your child, even if he does not do it perfectly.

Involve your child in the choice of chores. Give him a list of the tasks that need to be done. Explain that some of the chores are mandatory (making his bed, picking up his clothes), while he can choose from the list of others.

Set clear expectations. Agree on how often and when chores need to be completed. Create a chore chart to track when chores do or do not get done.

Take time to demonstrate and teach your child what a chore involves. If he resists, do the chore with him at first. Supervise once or twice before having him do it on his own, and continue to provide positive feedback and reinforcement.

Create the right balance. Too many chores can make your child feel overloaded and frustrated. Make sure he has some time each day to play and have fun. When you can, assign fun chores or look for ways to make the regular ones more enjoyable.

Offer rewards when chores are completed well and on time. These could be treats or privileges.

Consider these options for your chore list:

  • Feed pets.
  • Walk the dog.
  • Take out the trash.
  • Fold and put away laundry.
  • Load or empty the dishwasher.
  • Set the table for meals.
  • Do yard work.
  • Wash the car.

Staying safe around strangers

Now that your child is a little older it is important to allow her a little more freedom. Perhaps she walks to school alone now. Or maybe she rides her bike down the street to the park. She could be home alone for a few minutes while you run to the neighbor’s to borrow something. This expanding freedom is normal and good for her. It lets her learn about how to function safely in the world, while still being protected and taught by you. More than before, she needs to understand how to stay safe.

As a parent, you want to keep your child safe: you make sure she wears a helmet and buckles her seatbelt and you tell her not to talk to strangers. Rules for wearing helmets and seatbelts are always a good idea. The rule against talking to strangers isn’t always as obvious. It can even confuse your child.

  • You may have taught your child to be helpful, so if a friendly adult asks her to help find a missing puppy, she is likely to want to help the grown-up.
  • A smiling stranger may convince your child that it is OK to talk with him.
  • There are times when children need to talk to a stranger, for example, if your child is lost, she will need help.

It is important to talk with your child about dangerous situations and how to handle them. Help her understand that grown-ups ask other grown-ups for help, they don’t ask children. Teach her that if a grown-up she does not know:

  • Asks her for directions, to take her picture, or to look at something, she should quickly walk away and tell a grown-up she does know what happened.
  • Asks for help finding a lost pet, she should quickly walk away and tell a grown-up she does know what happened.
  • Calls her by name it does not mean that he knows her. To help keep this from happening, do not write your child’s name on the outside of clothing or backpacks where a stranger could read it.
  • Tells her that there has been an emergency or that something has happened to you, she should not believe it. She should find an adult she knows to confirm the story.

Make sure your child she knows that it is OK to make a fuss and yell if she is scared. Teach her to yell, “This is not my father! Help me!” Bystanders watching a child struggle with an adult may assume that the adult is a parent with a misbehaving child if they are not told otherwise.

Your child needs a plan for when she gets lost. Teach her to ask a grandmother or a mother for help. These people are far less likely to be dangerous. They usually want to help children and are easy for kids to recognize.

When you go someplace where you might get separated, agree on a place to meet. For example, at a grocery store you could agree to meet by the checkout counter with the number 1 on it. Or at an amusement park meet by the big tree at the entrance with a sign or a statue she will remember. Tell her to not go there alone, but to get a mother or grandmother to help her get there.

Do not avoid talking about stranger safety because you are afraid of scaring your child. She already knows that some things in life are scary. Talking about these things will make her feel more confident and keep her safer.

Talking with your child will:

  • Encourage her to tell you if any adult has made her uncomfortable, even if she knows the adult.
  • Teach her to trust her instincts.
  • Reassure her that you will never be mad at her for telling and that you can always keep her safe.

Talk about how to deal with getting lost and stranger safety the way you talk about wearing helmets, seatbelts, and sitting in booster seats. A child is much more likely to be hurt by a car than a stranger.